


A Perfect Day for Banana Slugs

by The Hag (hagsrus)



Category: The Professionals
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-19
Updated: 2011-11-19
Packaged: 2017-10-26 06:39:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/279904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hagsrus/pseuds/The%20Hag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a bit of fluff, originally written to distract myself from the horrors of April 15th, 1999</p><p>(Title: apologies to J.D.Salinger)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Perfect Day for Banana Slugs

"Really fancied that bird," Bodie said wistfully. "Can't I--?"

"Me or the bird," Doyle said firmly. "What's in there? Oh god!"

"Banana slugs. Like bananas, don't you?"

"Bananas I can cope with," Doyle said. "Banana slugs I draw the line."

"Don't want to get one for Cowley's birthday, then?" Bodie lingered beside the display terrarium.

"Give it to him in an empty Glenfiddich bottle. He'd slug you."

"Leave the malt in the bottle, you think he'd drink it anyway?"

"Wouldn't do the slug any good, would it? Probably get the RSPCA down on us like a ton of bricks."

"Well, what about tequila, then? Cruel to those worms."

"Don't think he likes tequila. What about a hissing cockroach?"

"Some kind of fancy drink?" Bodie followed Doyle to the next display. "Judas priest on a pogo stick! Are those real?"

"Get them trained to attack," said Doyle thoughtfully, "put the Alsatian breeders right out of business. Talk about your  
psychological edge."

"You talk about it. Don't you want a trained slug too?"

"Got you, sunshine."

"Not for long," Bodie muttered. "I've had it with Exotic Pets. I'm going to the Food Hall and look at something wholesome, like chocolate-covered ants or crispy-fried grasshoppers. But," he added defiantly, "first I'm going to have another chat with that bird."

"Don't go trying to pass on any bad language," Doyle ordered. "Pretty Polly is all it needs."

[End]


End file.
